After The Happily Ever After
by Kitten The Kokeshi Doll
Summary: Sequel to 'Marriage Conselling' What happens when the happily ever after isn't quite so happily ever after?
1. Chapter 1

A/n: I said I'd get a sequel up didn't I? Sequel to marriage counselling.

Chapter 1:

Hi. I'm Dana Cruz... feels weird saying that again. See I was Dana Johansson for so long it kinda stuck. Today is my best friends wedding day, Zoey Brooks is about to become Zoey matthews. I'm chief bridesmade... for the third time in my life. You know what they say... three times a bridesmaid, never the bride. Weddings always make me teary, I don't want to cry but as I walk my toddling one year old (Zoey's flower girl) down the aisle, I am severely temped. ("Rhiannnon sweetie, throw them don't eat them!")

I take my place besides Logan as they take their vows. My wedding was awful, someone might as well have held a shot gun to my back, I shudder and Logan sees my discomfort. He's not my husband... heck he's not even my boyfriend. He's my therapisy, and also my daughters dad. Yes little miss innocent Cruz was bonking her therapist while she was married... Aren't I nice?

I'm in full floods now.  
"Mommy no wy." Rhiannon whispered. I pick her up and cuddle her.  
"Mommy's just happy sweetheart." I tell her. Logan's hand rubs my shoulder comfortingly. it's actually kind of sivkening. I really like him but I guess it's not mutual, there was something, before Rhi was born, when I first moved in with him, some sort of spark but it faded. My one pet peeve is that he psycho analyses me ALL the time, other than that he's basically the perfect guy.

* * *

So... Zoey and Chase are married. I'm sat on a couch watching tellytubbied with Rhiannon and Logan. It's ok when it's the three of us, it just seems right, mommy daddy and baby. But when Rhiannon goes to bed it always gets awkward. It's like neither of us know how to interact with one another.  
"Do you ever imagine your wedding day?" I ask in interest on one of these long silent nights whilst our daughter is sleeping. Chase and Zoey's got me thinking, it's got me asking questions.  
"I guess..." He shrugged "Dunno do you?" I nod wistfully.  
"My second time down the aisle is going to be 'the one'... I don't care about the price or the guests or even the dress... as long as it's better than the last time..." I breathe. He smirks.  
"Well, it'd be hard pressed for you to do worse." I pause  
"Think we'll ever get married."  
"Dana..." He sighs shaking his head. "I thought we were clear on this..." Oh no god he's going to lecture me.  
"I didn't mean to each other!" I'm very aware that I'm blushing. I'd love to marry him.

"Oh right! Me maybe... you... definitely." He smiles softly. I hate it when he smiles. He does it deliberately to make me feel wooshish. I'm not too articulate when he smiles either.  
"Why?"  
"You're smart." he says tapping his thumb. "Gorgeous, amazing, funny, caring..." he ticks off each finger. As he runs out of fingers I cut him off.  
"I also have an ex husband and a baby." I sigh heftily realising just how much baggae I come with, another reason Logan would be perfect for me. He knows all of this already.  
"So... Rhiannon won't hold you back and Paolo's history... come on what man wouldn't want you?" He playfully punches my shoulder.  
"I can name one..." I whisper.

See that's me trying to hit on him. He knows it, and here it comes...  
"Dana you crave attention." he always does that. Whenever I suggest anything between us he starts to psychoanalyse me. I ALWAYS deny it, I don't crave attention. But tonight is different, Zoey is MARRIED for pete's sake. I want that, that happy life, the romance. So tonight I DO crave attention.  
"Then give me it?" I plead. he looks shocked, partially I suppose because I've never agreed with his psychobabble, and partially because I'm coming onto him. I take the opportunity during his stunned silence to kiss him. But he has fast reflexes, almost as soon as my lips are on his he's pulled back. I bite my lip. he sighs and sinks lower into his seat.

There is a deafening silence before he speaks.  
"It's not fair on Rhiannon." He says very softly.  
"Why not?" I ask curiously, Rhiannon could use stability, I mean when she gets to five years old she's going to start wondering why mommy and daddy don't sleep in the same bed surely?  
"You think at 21 we'd be together forever? If we have a really nasty break up... what happens to her?"  
"Logan..." I start, intending to find a rebuttle.  
"Dana you think I don't want this? You think I don't love you? I do Dana I promise... but we have Rhiannon to think about." He said the L word! OMG! (Hey... I just reminded myself of Nicole Bristow)  
"But... if we never give it a shot we'll never know. Maybe we are true love?" I suggest hopefully putting my hand on his.

"Dana we're a fling gone wrong!" He snaps. He's angry and upset. I catch my breath.  
"How can you say that?" I can't believe it. "How can you say this is WRONG!" I demand. "Rhiannon is my world! I thought she was yours too, but if you don't feel that way then maybe we should just leave!" I cry. I hate crying, it's one thing to cry at a wedding but Logan made me cry and that's totally different. I've always prided myself on being strong. He doesn't know what to do, so he wraps his arms around me protectively.  
"I'm sorry Dana. I didn't mean that. She is my world." He whispers in my ear "Don't take her from me... don't leave Dana, please."  
"I won't... I have no where. No ONE else..." I sigh depressedly into his shirt.  
"Even if you did..."  
"I wouldn't leave." I assure him softly, moving closer into his cuddle. I think I'm starting to fall asleep, but I don't want to get up and go to bed.

* * *

It feels nice, to wake up in his arms. Seriously, I have never EVER done that with a guy. I've slept with two guys. Paolo was never into that, with Paolo sex was sex was sex. With Logan I didn't technically 'sleep' there was no bed involved, just a leather therapists couch. So I've never woken up in a man's arms. He looks so peaceful when he sleeps, I can't resist stealing a kiss while he sleeps. I pull back thanking him for staying asleep. I hear Rhiannon waking up in the bedroom. I don't want to see her, for the first time since she was born I don't want to see her. I want to stay here. I kiss Logan again, praying she'll stay asleep but there's no such luck as she starts to cry. Logan wakes mid kiss and to my complete surprise he kisses me back.

I haven't kissed him since I was 19! He breaks off, says nothing and goes to see Rhiannon. All morning we're shy and nervous and awkward. As reassurance when I cook dinner and Rhiannon's in her highchair in the next room he kisses my cheek.  
"I DO love you... kay." He says. If he's trying to convince me that it's better that we stay apart he's not doing a good job. I'm ansty for the night time, for when Rhiannon goes to bed, and I find myself intentionally putting her to bed a little earlier.

I kiss him very suddenly, and I think I scare him because he falls against the door.  
"Dana don't..." He says awkwardly.  
"Logan..." All I hafta say is his name and he nods, I think he understands that I love him. I don't even think it has to be said. I won't explain the next part, but the kissing progressed, and for the second morning running I wake up in his arms.

A/n: What do you think?


	2. Third times a charm

**A/n: I'm trying to write all this at once so I don't get too far behind. Rhiannon is pronounced Ree-Ann-On. Yahoo search 'Ultimate Zoey 101' there's a chat going on on the 11th, and the cast could show.**

**Chapter 2: **

He sits me down on the couch and paces, he's got his serious face on. His serious face always scares me, because it reminds me of back when he was my therapist.  
"Dana... last night..." He says awkwardly.  
"Was amazing..." I finish with a gentle smile. He sighs and nods.  
"Well yeah it was amazing but... Dana that can't happen again." I was kind of expecting that. "We have to control ourselves for Rhi's sake... you know that. You understand why we can't be together right?" I nod. I hate him talking to me like I'm a baby, it's incredibly irritating. When he's not psychobabbling, he's patronizing.  
"Logan I'm happy for now." I say honestly. "But one day I WILL want to get married... maybe have more kids. You understand THAT right?" He nods.  
"Yeah... but Dana by then it probably won't be ME you want to marry and have kids with." I roll my eyes, knowing it always will be.  
And just like that things go back to the way they were, it was kinda like it never happened. Except now he knows how I feel about him, and I know he likes me too, so there's something positive in the mix.

**

* * *

Zoey gets back from her honeymoon looking sinfully tanned 3 weeks later. She looks like a goddesss, if she weren't my best friend I'd hate her. Sat at my coffee table whilst Logan's at work and Rhi's in the living room in the playpen, she gushes about her amazing husband, the awesome beach ("The fabulous sex"). I hafta admit... I envy the lucky S.O.B. She's basically had a perfect life, always has done and she always will do. And she's ALWAYS so positive. I bet her house could fall on her head and she'd just smile and say 'I've always wanted a skylight. So in an attempt to one up her I accidentally on purpose let slip what happened with me and Logan. **

I expect her to giggle like a school girl and call us naughty and ask for details like she did when our former workmate Angelica slept with her ex-boyfriend's bi-boyfriend for revenge. Instead her tan skin becomes pale and she glowers at me  
**"What?" I ask nervously.  
"You used protection right?" She asks seriously, I actually have to think back.  
"No... so..." She looks almost angry at me now, which I think is highly hypocritical.  
"If I get pregnant Dana... that's fine. I'm secure... but your situation with Logan."  
"Poop..." (Hafta be careful swearing near Rhi) I hadn't even thought of that. Me getting knocked up again would be a disaster.  
"Take a test next week!" Zoey orders. "And if it's negative for gods sakes go on the pill!" she sighs heftily. "If there weren't a chance you were knocked up I'd beat the heck out of you for being so stupid... you know that?" I thoroughly think I'd deserve it. Ugh I'm such a moron! And so is Logan... why didn't he protect me? I guess I've always looked after myself, and if I am... **

I don't even want to think about it.

* * *

**Positive. Oh... my... god. Positive. I have no idea what to do. I have no idea who to tell... Logan's going to go ballistic if I tell him, but he has to find out some way or another. Sulking a little during dinner, I fork the word 'Daddy' into his mash potatoes. Subtle and creative. But he doesn't get it. Instead at dinner he just laughs and says.  
"Nice try cruz but she can barely say it nevermind spell it. Can you angel?" He smiles at Rhiannon. See he's such a good dad and I absolutely hate that he says we can't be together, he says I crave attention... but he seems to push it away. I'm not licked yet. I have around 30 plans to tell him one way or another that we're going to have a baby. After dinner when we're sat watching Blue's Clues for Rhiannon, I place my hand on my tummy and smile vaguely. He doesn't seem to notice, so I give a murmered humming noise, rubbing my tummy and looking down at it.  
"Indigestion?" Logan asks me. GAH! I could not have been more obvious there... could I? **

I try again a few days later, emplying Rhiannon in my little scheme. I get her to point at my stomach when her dad walks into the room and go 'BABY', which is definitely her favourite word in the world. She says 'baby didda do it' a lot... when normally she did do it.  
"Oh god..." Says Logan. I assume he's clicked. "She's uhm... she's a girl. YOU give her the talk?" The talk... she's one! She doesn't know where babies come from, and he assumes she's asking. Why is he so dense...  
"Uhm... maybe when she's a little older." He nods curtly and picks her up, spinning her in the air.  
"Aboo! How's my little angel? Huh?" I can't help but smile... part of me worries he'll blame me. But I know that he's amazing with Rhi. No more schemes... I'm just going to have to tell him straight forward... but not now. Rhi's giggling in exictement as Logan spins her in the air, I don't want to interupt the perfect moment. I'll tell him tomorrow after work.

Whilst he's at work I'm always stuck with Rhiannon, I don't mind, she's lovely, but I would love some company other than the kind whos diapers I have to change, plus she normally falls asleep at about 2 o clock and wakes up just after Logan gets home, between two and five I generally do housework. Logan allows me to tidy his room, but I'm always frightened I'll go in and find something I don't want to see, but I never do. I'm making his bed and pick up a pillow... it'll be fun. Being a mom again. I'm not sure if I remember how to even hold a newborn. I pull the pillow into the crook of my elbow and rock it sideways. I find the words on my lips without even thinking about it.  
"Hush little baby don't say a word, momma's gonna buy you a mocking bird..." I sing to myself a lot, and Rhiannon. But I never sing when anyone else can hear me. I think in psychobabble talk it's traumatic for me, I sang to my first baby bump a lot.

"Nope, nuh uh, no way." Logan laughs walking into the room. I panick, he's home early. "Rhiannon's enough of a handful. No more real or pretend kay." he smiles and takes the pillow from me, throwing it back onto his bed. I know it was supposed to be painful, but I facefault. He rolls his eyes. "Come off it Dana..." I try not to cry. I guess the baby's making me emotional, I wipe my eyes furiously.  
"Wait..." he suddenly clicks. "Are you... are we... and when we... did you... Jesus!" I sit down on the bed staring at him, waiting for a response. He leans against the wall, his eyes closed, deep in thought... I think he might be mad because the silence is killing me.

"I'm sorry..." He says eventually with a hefty sigh.  
"YOU?" I say incredulously.  
"Yeah me..." He doesn't SOUND mad, but he might just be good at hiding it. "I'm assuming you want to keep it?"  
"Of course!" I'm shocked he'd even ask. Theres another very long silence until he speaks.  
"C'mere." I stand up cautiously and he pulls me into a hug. It feels weird, it's over protective, and there doesn't seem to be any feeling in it. It's like I'm hugging a brick wall. Rhiannon starts screaming her usual I-Hear-Daddy-Want-His-Attention-Now scream.  
"Guess we'll have to get used to that again..."  
"We JUST got Rhiannon into a routine..." I sigh.  
"Don't worry about it Dana... we'll be fine." He kisses my forehead very softly and slips his hand onto my stomach. "You were hinting at this earlier this week... weren't you?"  
"Yeah... you're seriously dense," I can't help but snicker. He rolls his eyes.  
"Okay it makes sense now. Yeah Rhiannon I'm coming!" He leaves me alone.

See... there's still no love. Three times now I've been in this situation. Baby in the belly but no lover. It's seriously depressing, I stay because he's given me everything. A gorgeous daughter, a home, he provides for us (I had to quit when Rhiannon was born). I couldn't leave, even if I wanted to. I talk to all my friends on the phone about it. Angelica suggests getting kinky. Nina suggests I shut up because Logan does everything and I'm ungrateful. Zoey reccomends I demand... She told me I have to give him the All Or Nothing...  
And I don't think I'm strong enough.

A/n: Done. Review. I post more. yes.


End file.
